A WORK OF STARGÅTE SG-1 FAN-FICTION—by Van ©2010
		Chapter 1

EARTH
CHEYENNE MOUNTAIN, COLORADO, USA
STARGATE COMMAND, SUB-LEVEL 19
THE ASTROPHYSICS LAB

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"There is no alternative," Freya said, snapping a red crystal into an empty socket on the photonic discriminator's primary array.  She slid the rack into its housing and the entire apparatus began to glow.  She tapped a button and the crystals went dark.

"She'll never go for it," Jay Felger said, tapping a key of the attached computer and starting the diagnostic program.

"It's ghoulish," Jennifer Hailey muttered, watching the procedure with a disapproving frown.  The four-foot-nine Lieutenant's arms were crossed over her chest, and she was tapping one uniform brogan on the concrete floor.

Felger pressed a function key and the crystal began to glow.  "On the other hand, it's not like we're digging up her body."  He squinted at the computer screen as it painted a phase response curve.  "It's only data."  Hailey's glare continued, and Felger's smile became a nervous grin.

"There is no alternative," Freya repeated.

Samantha Carter entered the lab.  "No alternative to what?"  She was dressed in one of her old military-brown tank-top/muscle-shirts, combat uniform pants in the new USAF "digital tiger stripe" pattern, and a pair of the new sage-green, suede combat boots.

"It's ghoulish," Hailey repeated, the disapproving frown on her pixie face unchanged.  She unconsciously reached down and brushed the front of her blue uniform skirt.  As long as she was only on loan from Stargate Command Administration, she'd be wearing Class-B uniforms while on duty.  She could hardly wait until next month, when she was due to rotate back to Stargate Ops, and could dress "combat casual" like her mentor and the other SG team members.

Freya stared at the young officer with a neutral expression, then turned to Sam.  "As you are aware, the control matrix of the proposed device will use Ancient technology scavenged from damaged equipment found on other worlds."  Sam nodded.  "And a host DNA sequence must be used to establish a loop bypass matrix for all sensor channels."

Sam nodded again.  Almost every important Ancient device the SGC or the Tok'ra had discovered had a built-in genetic safeguard to prevent its use by the Goa'uld.  Unfortunately, this also excluded the Tok'ra.  Goa'uld (and Tok'ra) scientists had been trying to circumvent this lock-out for centuries.  The goal of the current project was far less ambitious.  The team was trying to create a test apparatus that could extract useful data from any Ancient device without actually turning it on.  This was prudent, as activating an Ancient device of unknown purpose had resulted in "interesting" consequences on more than one occasion.

"The DNA bypass-trigger will be used to encode signals in several dimensions," Freya continued, "including resonant subspace and harmonically resonant parallel space-time."

Sam nodded.  This was not news.

"If we use the DNA of a living person," Freya said, "meaning a person alive in this quantum reality—"

"Entropic cascade failure," Sam suggested.

"So brilliant," Felger sighed, staring at Sam with an expression of open worship.

Hailey rolled her eyes and delivered a nudging kick to Felger's left leg.  "You're doing it again," she scolded in a whisper.

Freya watched with polite amusement, Sam carefully ignored the exchange, and Felger blushed.

"Exactly, entropic cascade failure," Freya responded, speaking to Sam.  "The person in question could suffer deleterious health effects whenever the device is activated."

"We agreed to find a suitable DNA sample from a deceased individual," Sam said to Freya.

"Yes, and we have," the Tok'ra scientist confirmed.

"Janet!" Hailey blurted.  "They want to use Janet Fraiser's DNA."

Sam frowned, and turned her back to the group.  "Janet," she whispered.

"Dr. Fraiser is a unique subject," Freya said.  "Not only do we have her entire genome on file, but also complete engrammatic matrix scans."

Sam turned back.  "You have all that?"

Freya smiled.  "Dr. Fraiser would not allow me to use any Tok'ra equipment to conduct my previous research at this facility without it being thoroughly tested on herself."

Sam smiled back.  "That's our Janet."

"It's ghoulish," Hailey muttered.

Sam paused, deep in thought, then locked eyes with her young subordinate.  "Lieutenant," she said softly, "you have to ask yourself... if Janet were here, right now, what would she say?"

Hailey's frown faded, and she sighed.  "She'd want to know if we needed a new DNA scan, or if the old scans would suffice."

Sam smiled and nodded, then turned to Freya.  "Okay, do it."

"Already done," Felger said.  The others turned to stare at him, and he continued, in a somewhat flustered manner.  "I-I downloaded the data into a white crystal, in case you said yes.  It's slotted, but not registered, which I can do now, with a simple reinitialization of the array... or later... or... lunch?"

Freya regarded the blushing scientist with her characteristic polite stare.  "I am not hungry.  I shall remain and prepare to implement the first test protocol."

"I had a big breakfast," Hailey said.  "I'll help."

Sam smiled.  "C'mon, Jay," she said to the still flustered Felger.  "It's Mexican day."

Felger's distress turned to a happy smile, and he followed Sam from the lab.

"I believe Dr. Felger is enamored of Major Carter," Freya remarked.  She stretched her arms towards the ceiling, then straightened the skintight, midriff-baring top of her Tok'ra "uniform".

Hailey snorted in amused disgust.  "You have a keen grasp of the obvious."  She turned to face Freya.  "I just remembered.  Staff Sergeant Spears wanted me to give you this."  She opened her briefcase and pulled out a bulging manila envelope.  Stapled to the front was a small piece of memo paper bearing the SGC logo and the hand-lettered note: "SCANNED INTO SGC DBASE REF FA/T/680-5".  She opened the envelope, and a rod of clear crystal and a dozen comic books spilled onto the lab bench.  "Bondage Fairies?  We need dirty comics to build this thing?"

"An unrelated ongoing project," Freya explained.  "Using your internet, I have compiled a catalog of human literature related to what you call 'fairies' or 'fey folk'.  This is the latest data that I asked to be digitized and transferred to crystal.  I suspect your planet's early cultural development may have been influenced by Nox and Furling explorers or renegades.  I will cross-reference this material with my research from other planets.  And in what way is this literature considered 'dirty'?"

"Bondage Fairies?" Hailey responded.  "This stuff is... kinky!"

Freya frowned.  "Kinky?  Sexual activity not considered the norm?"

"Duh!" Hailey answered, then noted Freya's continued confusion.  "Yes, not the norm.  We don't tie each other up for sex... on earth, I mean... much."

"I see," Freya said.  She opened a small, casket-like case.  Inside was a neat row of clear data crystals, as well as a large, amber crystal that served as the Tok'ra equivalent of an earthly computer's central processing unit.  She plugged the newly scanned "Bondage Fairies" crystal into an empty slot and it and the amber crystal began to glow.  "Kinky," she reiterated.  "How very curious.  On my planet—by which I mean my home planet, before I became a host—courtship by abduction is a cultural tradition, with festivals and holidays, stylized methods of restraint, and a long history in art and literature."

Hailey was incredulous.  "Your entire planet is into bondage?"

"All cultures have socialized institutions to facilitate pair-bonding and reproduction," Freya lectured.  "What could be more natural than affirming one's suitability as a mate by demonstrating the ability to exert control?"

"If a boy likes a girl—he ties her up??"

Freya smiled.  "It is more complicated than that.  Courtship involves flirtation and recreational activities with ropes and other restraints.  For formal marriage there is a ceremonial abduction, with the bride's family offering token resistance, of course.  And there are traditions and practices of juvenile play and adult friendship rituals."

Hailey was slightly scandalized (and more than a little curious).  "Like... what?"

Freya smiled.  "I mentioned adult friendships."  She opened a drawer in the lab bench and pulled out a length of braided nylon cord.  It was olive drab, the kind the SGC used in the field for lashing or rigging tarps.  With practiced fingers, she whipped the rope into a complex, symmetrical, bow-like knot with a pair of dangling loops on either side.

Hailey frowned.  "What are you—"  Before Hailey was aware of her intentions, Frey had seized her right wrist, spun her around, pulled her hands behind her back, and captured both of her wrists in the knot's loops.  "Hey!"

Freya tugged the free ends of the knot and the loops tightened.  Hailey gave a tug, but found no slack.  She pulled harder, but the knot held firm. 

"Relax, Lieutenant," Freya said, "this is only a demonstration.  Female friends of marriageable age often practice courtship rituals in both the abductor and abductee roles, for learning and recreation.  I won't harm you.  There is no need to be frightened."

Hailey stopped struggling, and glared over her shoulder at her captor.  "I'm not frightened," she huffed.  "You surprised me, is all."  She twisted her wrists again, and was still unable to free herself.

Freya smiled.  "It is a long-standing tradition, demonstrating trust and commitment... between friends."

Hailey was far from panicked.  She'd been through Air Force SERE training, like all SGC personnel cleared for off-world team assignment, and had been tied up and "abused" during the simulated POW camp part of the training.  She was also quite aware that Freya/Anise was not only from a different culture, but she was not of this world.  If someone else had tried something like this, Haily would have cleaned their clock—or would have tried, anyway.  The knot was still holding.  In this case, not only did Hailey not want to offend an alien visitor... she liked Freya.  Hailey twisted her wrists again.  I'll play along, for a while, she decided.  "So, I'm supposedly practicing being kidnapped by my sweetheart?"

"Some find it physically taxing to be bound for long periods," Freya explained.  "Hence the need for practice."

"Well, yeah," Hailey muttered, "I can see how—'long periods'?"

Freya smiled.  "Most charming, Lieutenant.  That expression of innocent apprehension is considered very flirtatious on my planet."

Hailey blushed.  "Yeah, well—we can't do this here."

"Why not?"

"We'll get caught!"  Hailey nodded towards the door.  "Someone will come in and it would be... awkward."

"That is true," Freya agreed, walked to the lab door, and turned the lock.  She turned back to smile at Hailey.  "This game is usually played for at least one hour.  If I were to set you free immediately after you were bound, it could be considered an insult, as if I found you unworthy of capture."

Hailey swallowed nervously.  So I'm... 'worthy'?

"Charming," Freya said, then reached back into the lab bench drawer and produced a second length of cord.

Hailey swallowed again.  "W-whatcha gonna do?"  She was embarrassed to hear the squeak in her voice.  She prided herself on her self-control and professionalism.  Why am I letting her do this? she wondered, and decided that curiosity was the only reasonable answer.

Freya put her hands on Hailey's waist.  Then, with surprising strength, she lifted her up and sat her on the lab table.  Hailey watched as Freya knelt, pulled her feet together, and looped the cord around her ankles.  "Do not be concerned.  I will remember to release you before the others return from their midday repast."

"That's very considerate of you," Hailey muttered, watching as a final, decorative knot was tied.

Freya took a step back, and blinked.  "This is considerate of you, Lieutenant," she intoned.  Her voice had changed timbre, and Hailey knew the consciousness of the symbiont, Anise, was speaking.  "Freya has grown lonely of late," she continued, "pining for a friend with whom to play her silly games.  Few of her fellow Tok'ra have a propensity for such nonsense."

Freya blinked again, and once again spoke as the human host of the Tok'ra partnership.  "I apologize.  That is Anise's way of scolding me for what she considers my human weakness.  The intricacies of interpersonal interaction are sometimes lost on her, I'm afraid.  This is why she prefers to specialize in the study of technology, rather than in a field having to do with people."

Freya blinked, yet again.  "I apologize as well."  It was Anise speaking, again.  "And my host's assessment of my socialization remains sadly inaccurate.  Why she doesn't simply gift herself to a suitable human remains a mystery."

Hailey bit her lower lip, trying her best not to laugh.  "Gift herself—yourself?"

Freya spoke.  "We once tried to communicate to O'Neill our interest in mutual sexual recreation.  It was on my behalf, as Anise finds Daniel Jackson more desirable.  In any case, the Colonel was not interested."

Hailey blushed.  "Really?  I mean... 'not interested'?"

Freya sighed.  "O'Neill has a strong anti-symbiont bias.  This is something the Tok'ra have encountered many times, on many worlds."

"Sorry," Hailey muttered, still blushing.  "Uh, how exactly do you... 'gift yourself'?"

"With the assistance of a close friend, or through self-restraining techniques, one is made helpless in the domicile of another, to be discovered—as a surprise," Freya explained.

"A gift," Hailey whispered, staring into space.  "I see."

Freya engaged the main control of the prototype diagnostic machine.  Its crystal arrays began to glow in a multitude of colors.  "I shall maintain quarter-power for one hour, to condition the interface facets," she said.  "The cleaner the transfer, the lower the noise floor."

Hailey nodded.  Goa'uld/Tok'ra crystal-based technology was still poorly understood by earth science, especially the aspects beyond "normal" space-time.  She watched as Freya withdrew each of the trays of glowing crystals, gave each framework a gentle shake, and slid them back into the main housing, one-by-one.  "Uh... Freya?" she said, quietly.

The Tok'ra turned to gaze at the diminutive Tau'ri.  "Yes, Lieutenant?"

Hailey's blush returned.  "If you ever do decide to gift yourself, uh, I'd be willing to help.  I know what it's like to be lonely."

Freya smiled, walked over to Hailey, and kissed her cheek.  "That is very kind of you.  Who do you suggest I might consider for such a purpose?"

Now Hailey's face was bright crimson.  "Uh, I, I..."  Her blush faded and her lips curled in a wry smile.  "You're goofin' on me, aren't you."

"If I understand the expression," Freya answered, "yes, I am goofing on you, Lieutenant."  She leaned forward again, and this time kissed Hailey full on the lips.  "Here, I shall release you—and I assure you it is not an insult."

"Okay," Hailey whispered, then leaned forward and to one side, to make it easier for Freya to untie the cord binding her wrists.

Neither woman noticed what was happening behind their backs, across the lab.  One of the crystals of the experimental device had begun to pulse and flash in a complex pattern.  One-by-one, starting with the new Bondage Fairies crystal, all the data crystals in Freya's case pulsed in perfect synchronization.  This continued for several seconds, then Freya's crystals went dark and the crystal in the experimental device returned to its former dim, steady glow, matching its neighbors.

The afternoon was a disappointment for the team.  The majority of the crystals they had decided to use for the experimental device had been salvaged from the war-ravaged ruin of one of Baal's cloning facilities, and while they all seemed to be functioning perfectly and the cobbled-together technology glowed and emitted a mildly irritating hum—it did nothing else.  All attempts to ping the crystal array with Tok'ra and human computers met with decidedly limited results.  The experimental device would not respond to commands—other than to return standard messages that signaled all was well and that programmed functions were proceeding within established parameters.  Since the device didn't yet have any "programmed functions" or "established parameters", this was most frustrating.

"Perhaps the crystals are ghosting on previous settings," Felger suggested, "and the array's trapped in a loop."

Freya shook her head.  "We have already considered and eliminated that possibility."

"We wiped all the crystals beforehand," Sam reminded him.

"And we've already pinged every crystal, one-by-one," Hailey added.

"But not the sub-space nexus crystals," Felger objected.  "We didn't wipe the sub-space nexus crystals."

"One cannot erase the sub-space resonance pattern of a nexus crystal without rendering it useless," Freya said.

"It's like wiping a specialized chip," Hailey explained.  "If you—"

"I know, I know," Felger interrupted.  "I'm just saying, we didn't wipe them."

"That is true," Freya responded, "but we have pinged them.  They are functioning in standby mode, and have not been tasked by the array."

Sam smiled.  "It was a good idea, Jay," she said.

"It was a good idea when I thought of it four hours ago, too," Hailey huffed.

"I mean the subspace response," Felger objected, glaring at Hailey.  "Perhaps they're active in subspace."

Hailey smiled, sweetly.  "Yes, if only we had some sort of diagnostic device with which to examine subspace elements without invoking a space-time response."

Felger blushed.  The hypothetical device Hailey was suggesting was exactly what they were trying to build.

Sam sent a mildly disapproving frown in Hailey's direction, then patted Felger's hand.  "It was a good idea," she reiterated.  "Keep thinking."

Felger smiled the beatific smile of a dog basking in the approval of its loving master.

Hailey rolled her eyes, but kept her tongue.

"Let's call it a day," Sam said, glancing at her watch.  "We'll let the crystals continue to cook, and get a fresh start in the morning."

"Very well," Freya intoned, and tapped an array of buttons that caused the crystals to fade to their quarter-power glow.  She tapped a final button and the crystal dimmed even further, until their inner fire was barely visible under the laboratory's bright lights.  "I have other research to pursue," she added, and closed the cover of her case of data crystals.  This revealed the stack of Bondage Fairies comics and the manila envelope.

Felger's expression brightened.  "Oh, you've got the new issue," he blurted, then blushed bright crimson.  "Uh, I mean—what are these?  Comics of some kind?"

Hailey was also blushing.  "Research material," she muttered.  "For... research."

Sam smiled, and focused on Freya.  "Your 'Nox and Furling Visitors' theory?" she asked.

"I have found nothing that contradicts my hypothesis," Freya responded.

Sam picked up the first comic in the stack and opened it to a random page—then blushed, quickly closed the cover, and returned it to the pile.  "Uh... if your search has reached this level, I think you've pretty much tapped out the data pool."

"I have already reached that conclusion," Freya said.  She slid the comics into the envelope, then placed it on top of the closed case and picked it up my its handles.  She was still the only one in the room not blushing or showing other signs of embarrassment.  "I shall retire to my quarters and revise my habiliments," she announced, focusing on Sam.  "Do you still intend to accompany me to the flesh-house you mentioned earlier?"

"Steakhouse," Sam muttered, still blushing.  "It's called a Steakhouse."  She carefully reasserted her smile, then retrieved her uniform top from the clothing tree near the door.  She pulled it on, zipped it up, then patted closed the velcro patches under the fold that covered the front seam.  "I better go with you," she told Freya, "to help make the appropriate selections."  

The team left the lab.  The last one out was Felger, who turned off the lights and pulled the door closed.

"Uh... she needs Major Carter's help to dress herself?" he whispered to Hailey.

Hailey smiled, then whispered back.  "Supply has some racks of earth clothes for off-world visitors, so they can blend in if they have to leave the mountain.  I think they started the collection right after Teal'c joined SG-1.  Anyway..."  Hailey's smile broadened.  "The last time the Major took Freya into town, she showed up at the elevator dressed in a strapless evening gown."

Felger blinked in confusion.

"They were on their way to go shopping at the Citadel Mall on a Saturday morning," Hailey explained.

"Oh," Felger whispered.  "I guess it can be kinda difficult to know how to dress in an alien culture."

Hailey eyed what she considered to be the truly hideous plaid shirt Felger was wearing under his lab coat.  "I guess," she agreed, perfectly deadpan.

Behind, in the dark lab, the crystal array of the experimental device glowed like an unusually large and exotic night-light.

Suddenly, the crystal that had pulsed earlier resumed its flickering and flashing... then it stopped.  Several seconds passed... and it pulsed again.  Several more seconds passed... and the entire array began to pulse.

Sam was the first in the lab the next morning.  This was not an unusual occurrence, as she would often sign in early, grab a cup of coffee at the mess hall, then go to her lab to check on any simulation or analysis programs that had been running during the night.  If all was well, she'd usually return to the mess hall for breakfast, then start the morning briefings or whatever else was on the plan-of-the-day.

That is not what happened on this particular morning.

As soon as Sam opened the door and turned on the lights, she could see that something was wrong.  The experimental array was glowing at full power, and as she watched, the crystals began flashing in a complex pattern, with waves of light and dark rippling across the multi-colored racks.  The pulsing light intensified—there was a brilliant flash—and what appeared to be an egg appeared on the lab table, about a meter from the machine.  It was quite large, at least three times the size of a typical hen's egg, and its smooth surface was mottled in different shades of brown and tan. 

Now that she looked, Sam could see at least a dozen similar eggs were scattered about the lab, on various racks, tables, and her desk.  Half were brown and tan, and the others were mottled in shades of gray.  Sam started forward, then froze in her tracks.  She'd nearly stepped on what appeared to be the remains of a broken egg.  She knelt and examined the shell.  It was one of the brown eggs.  Its interior was a light, delicate shade of willow-green, and under the pile of fragments was a nearly-dried puddle of clear fluid.  Sam realized the egg hadn't broken—it had hatched!

"Tee-hee-hee!"

Sam's gaze darted around the lab, but she was unable to find the source of the high-pitched, soprano laughter.  "Who's there?" she demanded, then stood, carefully stepped over the shell fragments, and began to search.  She counted a total of seventeen eggs, including the one that had hatched, but the source of the laughter remained elusive.

The crystal array began to hum and flash.  Sam stepped forward and stabbed the power button—but the crystals continued to pulse.

"Hee-hee-hee!"

There it was again!  As Sam searched the equipment-cluttered shelves and stooped to look under the tables and stools, several times she thought she saw movement, just at the edge of her peripheral vision; but, whenever she tried to focus on the source, there was nothing there.

Sam eyed the red alarm button mounted on the wall beside the door.  Better safe than sorry, she decided.  She had just started in that direction—when suddenly there was a blinding flash and she felt a strange, skin-crawling tingling over her entire body.  "Wha—?"

That was all Sam had time to think or say before everything went black.

Sam opened her eyes... but there wasn't much for her to see.  She was in near darkness, and was under a heavy pile of soft, silky cloth.  She tried to move, the fabric slipped and slid to the side, and she could feel another layer.  It was rough canvas, or something like it.

"What the hell?"

It was as if someone had covered her with the canopy of an open parachute, and then a large, unfolded tent.  She scrambled and clawed her way completely free of the parachute, and realized in the process that she was completely naked!  Even her dog-tags and watch were missing!

The tent was mottled in shades of sage-green.  It was difficult to to be sure, as the only available light was what was filtering through the coarsely woven fabric, but it seemed to more-or-less match the colors of the camouflaged combat uniform she'd been wearing before... before whatever the hell just happened.  The light seemed to be brighter to one side, so Sam crawled in that direction until she came to a seam.  The fabric was doubled and stitched with heavy cord at that point, so it was a challenge to squirm out from under the heavy folds, but she finally made it—than gasped and stared at her surroundings in open wonder!

Sam was still in her lab, but things had... changed.

The tables and equipment racks loomed like tall buildings, and the lab ceiling was at least a couple of hundred feet overhead!  She was, indeed, staring at her own lab, but from the perspective of a mouse!

Sam realized the "tent" was actually her own clothing!  Her blouse and pants were... huge... and the pants were still tucked into a colossal pair of combat boots.  The 'parachute' must have been my panties or tank-top, she realized, and... I'm hallucinating like crazy!  I must have been zapped by a bolt of energy from the machine!  She noticed the experimental rig was still atop the lab table, and it was still glowing and flashing.  I've got a concussion, and—

"Tee-hee-hee!"

Sam spun around—and nearly fainted from surprise!

Standing about ten meters away (or ten inches, depending on one's frame of reference) was a NAKED FAIRY!  It, no she—it was unmistakably a she—was a fairy, and could be nothing else!  She was roughly Sam's size, or maybe a little shorter, a pair of dragonfly wings protruded from somewhere behind the fey creature's back, and she had pointed ears—Like a Vulcan or Elf, Sam thought, somewhere in the back of her increasingly frazzled mind.  She also had smooth, tan skin; a svelte, athletic figure (with firm, perfect breasts); silky, reddish-brown hair; the cutest little bow mouth and button nose, and—she was JANET FRAISER!

Sam opened her mouth to speak—and her breath caught in her throat.  Hallucinating! she realized.  She closed her mouth, swallowed, and tried again.  "Wha—?"

The fairy, the Janet fairy, smiled and pointed her right index finger in Sam's direction—there was a flash—and for the second time since Sam entered the lab, all went black.